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NoLytics

Welcome to NoLytics!

Welcome to NoLytics, the world’s most confidently wrong
source of information. At first glance, we look legit—but
stick around and you’ll realize it’s all sarcasm, nonsense, and
adorable otters in glasses. Because why be helpful when you
can be hilarious?

Otter at a computer saying 'What kind of advice is this?'

Our Purpose

The purpose of my website is to be fun and lighthearted—and just the right amount of confusing. We specialize in the kind of advice that makes you pause and say, “Wait… what?” Everything in our Data Center has been thoroughly researched by only the best minds (probably). We guarantee this will change everything for you—in the best, most questionably helpful way possible.

Otters researching on computers
Group of otters in lab coats around scientific equipment
Otters conducting experiments at a table